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Monday, July 16, 2007
but when the rhapsody plays; it takes my breath away


Most of my friends are really good for building up my ego and confidence. They encourage me to strive for the better, my pillars of support believe I have the potential to do it.
However, there are still some who keeps unknowingly hurting me.
Especially my family, who are supposed to be always there for me through thick and thin are always making assumptions that I`ve not really turned over a new leaf at all. I thought blood is thicker than water?

I`ve really changed alot already, why can`t your see it? The attire, the attitude, the language, the behaviour, the studies, the results.

Since young, I have low self esteem problems. Eveytime someone says something degrading about me, be it jokingly or whatsoever, I would either sink into depression or slide back down to the bottom rung of the success ladder.

I`m already out of the rebellion phase that has been affecting me the past 2 years. I`m only a human. Please don`t expect too much from me at one go. I might fortuitously just walk the wrong path of life again.

I want to prove to my beloved ones who have made a positive impact in my life right. I`m doing what I`m doing so as to not disappoint them. But when the ones who love me the most, my father and my mother, who gave me life, unceasingly distrust my words, how can I can strong enough to ignore their criticism?

My heart is more fragile than most think it is. They just don`t see the way I cry in my room every now and then when the going gets too tough. Rebelling against all authority is not in it for me nowadays like it was during my 13th and 14th years of life on this earth. In fact, I`m even trying to get into the good books of authority.

There are just so many who don`t believe in me. The youth of today makes many silly mistakes that they really can`t be blamed for. I`m reaching out to ask for trust from my loved ones. So simple, yet so hard to achieve.

My precious darlings who have always stood by me even when I`m acting like a total bitch;
Vincent, Lydia, Jes, Weicong, Perry.
I love you all forever and ever more.

9:13:00 PM


2nd May 1992

I love my doggy, Honey. She means the entire world to me.

kiss me


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chermaine yong
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